God brings the right friends and people into each of our lives, and it is not by accident allow me to expand a little.
When we first get saved, we are all aware that over the first few months’ God carries us and many Christians fondly call this the honeymoon season. However, part of this season is Holy Spirit starting to put things and people in place around us that He will use to support and help in His plan and purpose for our life (Jer. 29:11).
He also lets us know through the scriptures, one of them being in John 15:19 that we are not of the world because He has chosen us out of the world so there is also a separation process going on in this honeymoon season that He has begun in each of us.
Within the first 2 months of being saved God brought two lovely ladies into my life who are now in glory, a few months later I was at ladies’ weekend away organised by the church where I was introduced to a lady and although this lady and myself were very chalk and cheese and would never have chosen each other in the world as friends God had a different plan and God still uses each of us to speak into one another’s life today. About a year later as I was starting a group another lady approached me and that led to another friendship which again, a friendship that I would not envisage yet today we are still friends and God uses each of us to speak and advise in our lives, through the first lady I was introduced to a couple and although the husband has gone to glory, I remain friends with his wife to this day. Now these friendships all began in the early days of my walk with Father and through that process the friends I had in the world began to disappear out of my life, can anyone resonate with this?
The point I am hoping to make in sharing this is we do not know what God Knows nor can we recognise the gifts qualities or character that is inside a person until Father reveals to each of us that yes therefore, I chose this friend for you and why we are still friends against all the odds of what the world would tell or advise us but GOD.
Which leads me to the question of how we help and support each other in our daily walk with Father.
When God advises us to help and come alongside our brother or sister who may need help advice /correction how do we deal with that lets have a look at an example from the word
2 Tim 3:16
All scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for correction for instruction in righteousness.
Exodus 18:18-36 Moses’ father-in-law gives advice
Testimony of situation at work
But who shall offend these little ones which believe in me, it would be better for him that a millstone was hung round his neck and that he was drowned in the depth of the sea?
Just for the record let us read v4 Who soever shall humble themselves as this little child the same is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
We need to keep a humble heart in all situations.
Math 18 :15-17
Moreover, if your brother shall trespass against you go and tell him about his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you shall have gained a brother.
And here I give my advice for this is expedient for you who have begun before not only to do but also to be forward a year ago.
(Expedient = suitable)
the man of God may be complete thoroughly equipped for every good work.
Read in the Message Read verses 10-20
As a young child and into adulthood I watched and heard my mother over the years her say one thing about a person and another thing to their face particularly among immediate family members and others out with the family members. This experience left me with a bluntness when I spoke to others, and I never really learned during this time about the word tactful through this. But I still believed in being truthful to others. I still find it difficult to dress my words up because I do not want to leave others with a false impression of what I am really saying nor do I want to have a different face for everybody, my preference is to be straight speaking truthful with the right tone in what I am saying. Now I am I still a work process with this and little by little getting better Amen.
Remember I often say we were born free but programmed differently
Now at this point I would like you to know that despite all of what I share with you today about my mother God healed our relationship before she passed, and we had a wonderful few years of restoration.
When I sought advice or help within the church body some people would tell me what they thought I wanted to hear or said what they thought was the right thing and a lot of the time I knew this in my spirit, so this reminded me of what I saw and heard growing up, so I found this very difficult.
Are you shoulder to shoulder with those whom God has placed around you?
are you truthful when they ask for advice?
or do you say what you think they should or want to hear?
Or are you honest and truthful?
It does not matter where they are, but it does matter where you are
Job 17: 5
He that speaks flattery to his friends even the eyes of his children shall fail.
for there is no faithfulness in their mouth their inward part is very wicked their throat is an open sepulchre they flatter with their tongue.
Nevertheless, they did flatter him with their mouth, and they lied unto him with their tongues.
Many of us do not like confrontation however how can we help others if
- We do not speak and advise with truth in love
- Face our own difficulties with this renew our thinking and do it Fathers way
- Remember the woman at the well Jesus spoke truth
- When Jesus upturned the tables at the temple
Keep thy heart with all diligence for out of it are the issues of life.
Try to keep a humble heart before the Lord and ask Him to guide and help us when others ask for advice or help.
if you do not want or know how to help the people who come and ask for advice then let them know that you will go and pray and seek the Lord. Do not patronise them by telling them what you think they want to hear and if you can’t / won’t then suggest someone who can like their pastor etc.
While you may know or can discern when a person is about to make a wrong choice then with love advise them and leave them with that choice, at the end of the day Father is only asking you to be truthful. if the person does not go back to God and seek confirmation and then goes on to make a mistake or a wrong choice then that is between them and God you must do your part and leave the rest, Amen.
Let me give you an example:
Testimony re Pastor Position
Some time ago I was offered the post of pastor in a church and although I did pray, I decided not to accept. I shared this with a friend that and she then advised I should go beck and speak to God which I did and realised I had gone to God in the first place having already decided. After a week I knew I had to accept I had received good advice, Amen.
God places the right people, pastor etc in our lives for a purpose.
Proverbs 27: 17
Iron sharpens iron so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.
I do not know how many times I have sought advice from people to be fobbed off with what they thought I wanted to hear and then went on to make wrong choices and mistakes only to informed later by that same person I spoke to that they did not want/ like to tell me because they felt it was none of their business.
Have you ever thought why the person approached you in the first place?
When someone seeks your advice/ counsel they very obviously have a trust in you, and you are very privileged to be sharing in their difficulties/ problems.
My question here is why God brought them to you to ask for help.
in this capacity Unspoken words do not do any good.
Can you change your focus from you can’t do to what you can help with?
It does not matter where they are, but it does matter where you are
Now I am not saying I would have heeded all that I was advised but at least I would have realised later that it had been given and that it was my responsibility to take it back to God and then make my decision.